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On Clinging.

Jesus said to Mary Magdalene, “Do not cling to me, for I have not yet ascended to the Father” (Jn 20). I’ve always wondered at that. Her Lord is risen! Why would Jesus tell Mary to back off, when she could again touch his incarnate, living, now resurrected, glorified body?! I see myself in that place, longing just to kiss his feet! Why would Jesus deny her?


In this passage, the reason seems to be that Jesus has an urgent mission for Mary: “Go to my brothers and tell them, 'I am going to my Father and your Father, to my God and your God.'" But I think the reason is further developed in the story of the Road to Emmaus. Jesus, present yet hidden from the disciples’ sight, reveals his fulfillment of prophecy. The response of the disciples is first an internal one, their hearts burning within them (as I felt myself when I first began to recognize the Real Presence of God in the Mass). Their succeeding action is to ask Jesus to stay with them, and not until he breaks bread do they recognize him! And again, I would think the impulse at this point would be to assail Jesus with embracing, kisses -- but at that moment he disappears! Didn’t that cause the disciples to feel somewhat abandoned in that crucial moment?

But I think Jesus knew he wasn’t going to be around in that form much longer, and was weaning, transitioning the disciples to recognizing, knowing him in the Eucharist -- the breaking of the bread -- his Body, Blood, Soul, and Divinity, available in perpetuity to all believers throughout space and time! Even throughout eternity, as we enter fully into the Wedding Feast of the Lamb and see God face to face, no longer in a mirror dimly, but with True Sight!

And even as I worship Jesus in the Eucharist, my mind and heart being constantly flooded with his Word, I want to cling. To not let these precious pearls be lost to my forgetfulness, to be able to speak of God’s glory to others! But clinging inherently blocks us to receiving even more.

Likewise when I receive the Host: today I had plenty of time processing and kneeling, looked up at Fr. Steve in persona Christi, uttered a more solid Amen (than at my First Communion, which was more of a strangulated croak), and more comfortably (again, compared to my sublimely awkward First) shaped my mouth and tongue as Father placed one of the fractioned Host on it. Again I close my mouth and further break the Host, cross myself, and return to my pew, but I postpone swallowing, if only for a bit. I cling, and wonder, marvel, worship. And every time, there comes a point, well before the Host inevitably dissolves in my mouth, that Wisdom says: Swallow. Do not cling to me. Receive more. So I do; Jesus enters that much more deeply into me. I no longer have control over the encounter, and I am free to be Christ in the world. Deo gratias!

"Behold what you are, become what you receive." -St. Augustine

For more on the Eucharist, my very favorite book (so far): Brant Pitre's Jesus and the Jewish Roots of the Eucharist

Comments

  1. I love these thoughts on the resurrection appearances. Very helpful. And that Augustine quote, wonderful!

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  2. So beautiful Lori! You tie together mind and heart in your writing, as Christ weaves them together for us in the Eucharist. Your love for our Lord shines through to others in so many ways. Thank you and God bless!
    barbarabjelland.wordpress.com

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